Blood Is Thicker Than Water
by FlowerGirly
Summary: GuanPing runs away from home & by a strange twist of fate meets a mysterious one eyed man named XiahouDun. After 3yrs of confessing their love for one another Xing & ZhangBao try to work things out & still keep their love a secret. Yinping, Suo & each member of the Guan family seeks to find the true meaning of happiness. Disclaimer I don't intend to cause nosebleeds - Modernverse
1. Chapter 1

AN: I have rewritten the original story, some of you may have read it before, I've reuploaded it as many of you said you liked it, I'll make sure to update a new chapter asap! The current two chapters are all the previous 5 chapters rewritten so none of them are new. I'll work on a newer chapter asap!

Thank you and enjoy! ^-^

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Chapter 1: Strange and unlikely

* * *

The raindrops hit hard against the ground. The darkness was eerie and the loud rain made it difficult to hear if there was anything approaching nearby. Guan Ping began to shiver as the cold numbed his body, and it wasn't like he was trying to find shelter, he allowed it to do so, inhaling the freshness. The rain smelt like fresh cut grass, and earth, something longed for in the city. Shanghai was huge, and once you've lived there for a while you begin to realise not all areas were the same, the closer you are to the middle the more busier, overcrowded and filthy the streets were, and the further away the more quiet and leafy it felt.

The rain was cruel that night, harsh and merciless, the sky was tar-black, and a moonless night it was. The street lights were bright and so where the lights peeping out of people's windows but neither were enough to make up for the absence of light from the skies. Houses told stories, in every window the silhouettes behind the curtains moved uniquely. Almost like a shadow show. Some houses were lively; you were able to see the energy through the activity within, while some were lonely, with only one room occupied while the rest of the house remained pitch black.

With the amount of rain that fell that night, you would have wished it was all for something, maybe wash away the emptiness and sorrow felt by mankind, people usually wished on good things, candles, stars, rainbows, tossing a coin into a wishing well, but wasn't the saying always that after rain comes sunshine? Then why didn't people make a wish then? What was less sacred about water falling from the skies anyway?

Guan Ping let out a heavy sigh once he noticed his phone switch off due to a dead battery. He knew he couldn't stay there all night, but had he found somewhere else to stay he wouldn't have been here sitting on the steps of an old building drowning in rain, and if he weren't going to die of depression or a nervous breakdown he was bound to die of pneumonia or some kind of fever. His hair was pushed down by the rain almost covering his eyes only to add more to his gloomy aesthetic.

There was a loud roar of a car engine pausing not too far away. Guan Ping looked up but all he could see was the bright headlights shining in the darkness, shining a bit too brightly to the point it was almost blinding. He wasn't sure what to do, does he run? He had no power left in him to do so, does he hide? How much longer was he going to stay here?

It was already late almost coming to 12 and the car had stopped in front of him, he probably should begin to worry in this case. For some reason he expected the car to be filled with men, maybe a group of kidnappers or paedophiles. But there was only one lonely figure that was presumably looking for something, stopping the search once he laid his finger on the light switch the man's features became slightly clearer.

Guan Ping stood up unsure of how to think or what to feel, maybe he should have ran along time ago but his feet were glued to their spot.

"Come here!" The mysterious man called, his voice was gruff but not scary.

Guan Ping approached the car slowly his feet making little splashes in the puddles. His clothes were uncomfortably stuck to him because of how wet they were. Leaving a small distance between them, his eyes were studying the other cautiously, ready to run if something was about to happen, only to be surprised when he got closer, the man's features were visible now, he looked like he was in his early thirties maybe. He had dark brown hair; and was dressed smartly… Guan Ping's eyes pinned to his face when he noticed an eye patch on the man's left eye, it wasn't everyday you would see someone wearing one, it made Ping wonder how he might have lost his eye. The man looked like some kind of office worker.

The mysterious male had taken a while to study him also, finding it strange to see a youth out at this time, it's not that you wouldn't see teens out at this time, but Ping didn't look like the type to be at bars or nightclubs, also his uniform gave off many clues. It was a creepy atmosphere after all, and the streets were empty, it only had one explanation.

Guan Ping took a long pause, swallowing a lump in his throat "What?" he asked quietly, his tone sounding calm.

"What's a minor like you doing out here at this time?" The one eyed man questioned sounding more curious than worried. Guan Ping was actually nineteen but the man had assumed that he was younger.

"Nothing" Guan Ping replied his voice sounding slightly lower than before, a frown appeared on his face as though something bad might have happened. It was obvious that it was either his parents had kicked him out the house or that he ran away but had nowhere to stay.

"Get in the car, you're gonna get sick" The man offered as he took out a packet of cigarettes, pulling one out and lighting it.

Guan Ping wasn't sure how to interpret the man's actions, he didn't smile once nor did he look friendly so it made his kindness feel strange, as if he wanted something in return.

The son of Guan Yu looked around one last time before pacing over to the other side and opening the door. Stupid move.

He had already been shaking before, but now the shivering had increased tremendously and the fact he was drenched made it worse. Upon noticing this, the older man turned the heater on to warm the car. Guan Ping knew it wasn't the right thing to do, but he had no other alternatives.

"I am Xiahou Dun" The man finally announced taking a blow of his cigarette. Holding it with his mouth, he pulled off his jacket tossing it into Guan Ping's lap. The other was quick to cover himself presuming that's why he gave it to him.

"You ran away from home?" The one eyed man questioned his tone remaining flat making it harder to figure it out his true intentions behind the question.

"I didn't run away from home!" Guan Ping replied defensively, which confirmed it for Xiahou Dun immediately.

"What happened then?" He asked trying to resist the urge to smirk as he drove off, Guan Ping wasn't really good at lying, and it was obvious to tell.

"I don't even know you, why Am I obliged to tell you" Guan Ping snapped, trying to find a reason to avoid the questions being fired at him, it was true he had just met the man and it was clearly none of his business but Ping was in no position to be rude after Dun had been so kind to him. Assuming he would mock him, and fail to understand what he was going through he preferred to keep lying instead.

"Fine. Where do you live? I'll drop you home" Xiahou Dun offered his tone sounding calm and relaxed as if he had all day.

"I don't want to go home..." Guan Ping protested sounding like a stubborn five year old; He folded his arms and sank into his seat.

Xiahou Dun stopped the car, and leaned over him pushing the door open, "Alright get out of my car" Xiahou Dun demanded seeming to lose his patience with the boy.

Guan Ping paused when he looked back at the cold hell he was sitting in previously. It was raining heavily and the ground was cold and hard, going back out there didn't seem like the best idea and there was no way he was going back home.

A thought struck him and he slowly turned quickly towards Dun "Can I stay for one night?" He asked quickly, not sounding like he was pleading really.

Xiahou Dun sighed not taking much time to think about it, he leaned over him again closing the car door and began to drive.

It made Ping feel more reassured. However he chose to remain silent for the majority of the way, he felt bad for imposing on him but his pride wouldn't allow him to return home. Resting his chin on his hand, he frowned watching the rain droplets trickle down the window; he wondered why he always kept putting himself in such awkward situations.

Before he knew it they were already there. Xiahou Dun opened the car door and held a folder over his head to cover himself from the rain as he walked out. Guan Ping quickly followed feeling so eager to put his head down and sleep, he was hungry and tired. But right now he wasn't going to push it, he was grateful enough he allowed him to sleep over.

Dun opened the door to his house and walked in leaving the door open behind him. Guan Ping followed hesitantly. He closed the door slowly and just before he had removed his shoes Xiahou Dun stopped him. "Wait there" He commanded walking into a place that might have been his bedroom. He returned shortly with a big towel in his hand, he threw it on Guan Ping and walked off into the living room. "Dry yourself!" He called out.

"Erm... Thank you..." Guan Ping mumbled not very pleased with the older man's attitude. Why couldn't he just give him the towel instead of throwing it at him? The son of Guan Yu followed into the living room slowly. He sat down on one of the sofas feeling a little shy and unsure of what to say. After all he does have to thank the man for letting him stay over, especially after how rude he was being to him. Just then Guan Ping remembered how he told him that he wouldn't tell him why he was out at that time because he didn't know him and yet now he was at his house... He just hoped that Dun had forgotten about it, or that maybe he wouldn't mention it.

Yuanrang walked over with two mugs in his hands, he placed one on the table in front of Guan Ping and sat back on the opposite sofa taking a sip from his own.

"You live alone?" Guan Ping asked quietly.

The one eyed man nodded. "You ran away from home?" Xiahou Dun asked again this time his question sounded more like a statement.

Guan Ping knew it was no use lying, so he nodded agreeing to the statement. Avoiding eye contact with Yuanrang, Ping reached out to take his cup, the warmth of the tea felt soothing and refreshing. He expected him to mock him or lecture him about the topic but he left it at that.

"What's your name?" Dun asked taking another sip from his warm coffee.

"Guan Ping..." He uttered eyes still pinned to the floor.

Upon hearing his name Xiahou Dun almost choked on his coffee, trying not to make it obvious. Dun tried to remain calm, he never thought that the boy would turn out to be the son of Guan Yu, nothing about him even looked the same. Guan Ping watched him quietly realising that the mood had gotten awkwardly silent. Or maybe that was only the case for Ping because Dun was lost in thought remembering all of his past problems with Guan Yu. But the fact Ping didn't react when he told him his name assured him that his father didn't tell him about any of it.

"Thank you... For letting me stay over" Guan Ping murmured, breaking the silence. Just then Yuanrang had snapped out of his thoughts, blinking a few times, he got up from his seat and walked over to his bedroom again. The youth sat and watched him wondering what he was up to this time.

He came out of the room with a blanket and a pillow and threw them at Guan Ping. Just before he could complain or moan about the action, Dun walked back to his bedroom. "I'll drop you off home in the morning" He called out.

Guan Ping pulled the blanket off his head and adjusted the pillow on the sofa and quickly jumped back covering himself with the blanket. Maybe the sofa wasn't as comfortable as his bed but it would do for now.

Guan Ping woke up to the sound of banging dishes; the savoury smell of omelettes cooking filled the room. Dun's house was small, so the kitchen was attached to the living room; there was only one bathroom and one bedroom it all seemed perfectly fitting for a single man living on his own. Guan Ping sat up rubbing his eyes. He felt a pain in his neck from sleeping on the uncomfortable sofa. He rubbed it to ease of the pain, getting up and walking over to taking a glance at what Dun was cooking.

"Good morning" Guan Ping yawned leaning on to the kitchen worktop.

"Hey" Xiahou Dun murmured turning the omelette around so that the other side would cook. "It's nearly ready" He announced pouring boiling water from the kettle into a mug.

"How come you're not married yet?" Guan Ping asked randomly. Xiahou Dun turned to look at him not only surprised by the question but also confused as to where the question came from. "I mean it saves you having to cook and all that" He added.

"I don't mind cooking" Xiahou Dun replied turning back to his omelette. "We'll have breakfast then I'll drop you off home" He tried to change the subject, sounding serious again.

"I don't want to go home" Guan Ping narrowed his eyes.

"Well you're going to" Xiahou Dun argued back.

"You can't force me" Guan Ping replied.

Xiahou Dun laid the tray to the dinner table "I know where you live, you're the son of Guan Yu" He implied.

Guan Ping narrowed his eyes once again looking annoyed at what he just heard. Why didn't he tell him before if he knew his father? He chose to just leave the argument at that and joined Yuanrang at the dinner table. Taking a few bites of the food he took a glance at Dun's face, exhaustion was clear on his face and the fact he was drinking coffee last night probably meant he had stayed up all night, probably to finish off some work or something.

"You're a good cook for a man" Guan Ping admitted. Xiahou Dun cocked an eyebrow, he wasn't sure if it was a compliment or an insult.

"For a man? Who cooks at your house?" He asked taking a sip from his tea.

"My little sister Yinping" Guan Ping stuffed his face more, it was obvious that he hadn't eaten since the time he decided to leave home.

"Your little sister? But you're the oldest, aren't you? What about your father, why doesn't he cook?" Dun sounded surprised.

"Father's always busy with work, and we're all boys at home no one knows how to do anything, Yinping takes care of everything, she really knows how to handle herself" Guan Ping added.

"But she's your little sister, you should help her out, I'm sure she would appreciate it from time to time if one of you helped her" Xiahou Dun lectured.

"She doesn't mind"

"She wouldn't tell you" Xiahou Dun argued.

Knowing that what the other was saying was right, Guan Ping decided to just keep quiet, he had nothing to say. He felt annoyed that a stranger had to tell him to look out for his own sister, it made him feel like he wasn't doing his job properly as an older brother.

* * *

Yuanrang stopped the car just at the top of the street Ping lived in. "Go home now, take a shower and get to school" He instructed. Guan Ping sank into his seat not really wanting to go. "Come on" Xiahou Dun leaned over him and pushed the door open. He ushered for him to leave but Ping really didn't want to. He got up slowly, closing the door behind him.

"Thank you…" Guan Ping uttered.

Dun nodded in affirmation giving a half hearted smiled, well that was probably Xiahou Dun's best smile but to anyone who didn't know him would assume it was fake.

The youth walked forward and just as he saw the car turnaround, he turned the other way. Then a few seconds later he turned back again. He was so confused, to go home or not to, he really didn't want to go home, but he really needed to take a shower. Knowing he had nowhere else to go, he decided to go home.

Just as he walked in he heard his family conversing on the breakfast table. Before he could enter he heard his father speak. "Don't mention him, I don't want to hear anything about him" Guan Yu yelled.

"Father..." Yinping's girly voice sounded so quite comparing to her father.

"I said enough is enough, I don't want to see his face ever again!" Guan Ping's heart sank when he heard his father's words, he was actually prepared to apologize and put everything aside, but right now the only thought that was going through his head was that his father didn't want him.

He went to his room quietly, not making any sound so no one would notice his return. Pulling out a bag from under his bed he took some of his clothes, towels, and a family photograph he had been keeping for years. He stopped for a minute when he realized what he was doing. Did he really want to remember any off it? Sighing heavily, he zipped his bag leaving the photograph in.

Just before he left the room he looked around to check that the coast was clear, hearing his family still conversing on the breakfast table, he quickly snuck out. Roaming the streets for a while, he stopped when he reached the same stairs he was in front off when he first met Xiahou Dun. The stairs belonged to an old nursery that had been shut down years ago, so it was okay to sit there, no one would complain.

Resting his head on his hand, he watched people walking by, cars driving past, and life going by. He sighed bringing his knees closer to his chest and laying his head down. He wasn't going to cry. He didn't want to cry, he promised himself he wouldn't. He had to accept it, at least Guan Yu put up with him for all those years; after all he wasn't his real father. The only thing he was worried about now was where he would sleep when it gets dark, or where he would get food. He carried no money on him and even if he wanted to work he wouldn't be able to since he didn't have any qualifications.

After hours of sitting on the hard steps he felt his backside go numb. It was really uncomfortable. Maybe he should ask his friends if they allowed him to stay over. Well maybe if he had any that is, but Ma Chao wa his friend surely he wouldn't mind. Guan Ping reached into his pocket pulling his phone out to call Ma Chao. He rang him a few times but there was no response. As always, he was never there when he needed him. Sighing heavily he smacked himself on the head... Now what?

A white car that looked like Xiahou Dun's drove past. Guan Ping shook his head, he was probably imagining things. Then the white car reversed back and it really was Xiahou Dun. The older man horned at him to come over. Guan Ping picked his bag up and walked as slowly as he could to the car knowing that he would receive another lecture.

"I see you've made it official" Xiahou Dun eyed the bag in his hand.

Guan Ping almost jumped scared to see that side of Xiahou Dun so suddenly. He continued to look ahead not giving a response.

After a few minutes of silence, he began to speak quietly. "Why do you even care?"

Dun didn't really have an answer to that question because he didn't know either.

"Quit being a brat and just go home, alright? Are you planning to live on those steps or something? You'll freeze to death, now quit being an idiot and go home" Xiahou Dun commanded, his voice sounding calmer than before.

"I'm not a brat!" Guan Ping yelled annoyed at the others lack of understanding. He turned to walk off, but Dun was quick to get out his car and force him in. He tried to open the car door and exit but Xiahou Dun locked it before he could. "Open the door!" Guan Ping yelled at him, his eyes were filled with tears, he felt angry at himself for it, and he tried his best to hold the tears back but he couldn't.

"I'm not going to" Xiahou Dun protested, taking out a cigarette and lighting it up.

Guan Ping cried like a little kid who had his favourite toy taken away from him. Dun sat quietly waiting for the youth to calm down.

Xiahou Dun began to drive. He headed to his home taking Guan Ping with him without asking him. Turning the car off when they reached Dun took Ping's bag, hanging it on his shoulder as he exited the car. "Come on" He told him. The boy opened the door slowly, still looking as miserable as before. He followed the man in and stopped in the hallway.

"Come on, you gonna stand there all day? Go take a shower while I make you something to eat" Dun headed into the living room. Guan Ping closed the door behind him slowly, taking his shoes off, he entered the living room searching for where Dun had placed his bag.

After pulling out a few things to wear and some towels, he was about to go till he remembered that he didn't really know where the bathroom was. "Where's the bathroom?" He asked his voice sounded so flat and dead that it even made Xiahou Dun raise his eyebrows in surprise. He walked ahead leading him to where it is, Guan Ping followed quietly as always. Dun walked in leaning down to a cupboard under the sink. He grabbed a shampoo bottle and a shower gel and handed them to Guan Ping. The son of Guan Yu thanked him but it was too quiet that Dun had missed it.

* * *

Coming out of the bath Guan Ping felt so refreshed and relaxed again. He yawned as he walked into the living room. It felt better to be out of the school uniform. He wore a red oversized hood with black three quarter shorts. Adding to the miserable look he hid his face inside his hood as he sat on the dinner table. Xiahou Dun came from behind him and pulled it down before he sat down placing the last plate on the table. Guan Ping glared at him, clearly failing to find it amusing, but then Xiahou Dun didn't look like he was joking anyway. Or maybe that was because he never smiled.

After lunch Xiahou Dun offered to let him sleep in his bed, Guan Ping wasn't in the mood to argue so he just took the offer. Lying in the warm bed he watched Xiahou Dun's tall figure close the curtains. Just as Dun was about to leave Guan Ping stopped him. "Why are you so kind to me?" He asked clearly confused by it all.

"Get some rest" Dun replied leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

* * *

The bright sunlight shone onto the pavement. Though the sun was shining it was still cold outside, but at least there was no rain. Zhang Bao warmly embraced Guan Xing. Xing pushed him back nonchalantly. "Not here..." He spoke quietly.

"Don't worry no one's gonna see, it's still early" He smiled moving away. The two would leave the house early every day to meet up with one another before school. They spent most of their time together but it was still not enough for Bao, he would always recommend for them to meet up somewhere, or go out to eat somewhere nice. It had been three years since they confessed their love for one another but it was just the same as before. It was as if they were friends. Xing liked to keep his distance, it wasn't that he didn't like Bao back but he wasn't very good at conveying his emotions, whether it was love or anything else. For those who didn't know him so well, he appeared as though he didn't care or was simply rude; but the truth was that he was just bad with words.

"So how come you're really early today?" Zhang Bao asked.

"Father kicked me out the house, he said he didn't want to see my face again" Guan Xing explained seemingly unbothered. It was him Guan Yu was talking about when Guan Ping returned home, not knowing what had happened with Xing he had mistakenly thought that his father meant him. Either way their father only spoke that way out of anger.

"Is there anyone left at home at all? Guan Ping left home, you got kicked out, is Suo going to be next?" Zhang Bao chuckled.

"Oh don't worry Suo will never get kicked out, father loves him" Xing remarked.

"Why don't you all just behave?" Bao sighed gazing at his friend with a displeased look on his face.

"It's not like that. Suo just does anything to please father, I'm not going to do that." He explained.

"Do you think it's the same with Ping?" Bao asked curious to know what Xing thought.

"No... He just wants attention..." Xing stated. Bao frowned upon hearing this; he thought that he was judging his brother without really understanding.

"And you?" Bao asked slightly hinting that there is no difference between him and Ping.

"I want my freedom" Xing stated. They passed the school gates. Going inside, they went to the back of the school near the fire exit stairs. They usually met their when they wanted some privacy during school hours. They would both be in serious trouble if they were caught there, the area was not allowed for students and the school janitor would usually scold them when he saw them there.

They placed their bags next to each other, Bao sat down by the metal fence and Xing joined him. Bao gazed into Xing's eyes wearing a big smile on his face. "You know... it's been three years and all, till now we haven't..."

"We haven't what?" Xing interrupted him quickly.

Bao looked away feeling a little embarrassed for having to make such a request. "We've never... kissed" He told him his tone slightly quite.

Xing looked away as well, feeling nervous and unsure of what to say. He folded his arms waiting for the other to react. It was usually like that, Bao had to always use his initiative to guess what Xing wanted, he always left him confused or expected him to fill in the gaps on his own.

Bao crawled closer to him gazing into his eyes, feeling a little hesitant. Xing was facing him but his eyes were looking somewhere else. It was clear that he was nervous too. After all it's been three years and not a single time had they ever gotten so intimate with each other.

"I- feel embarrassed for admitting this... But I've never kissed someone before" Bao confessed his face turning a light shade of red. "So… I might not good at this stuff" He scratched the back of his head.

"Me too..." Xing confessed quietly, his face expression remaining neutral as usual.

Bao sighed. "That makes me feel a little better" He smiled anxiously. Xing turned towards him waiting for him to hurry up and kiss him already. He felt like it was taking too long, he was already just as uneasy as Bao and his heart was hammering through his chest. It pounded so loudly he could almost hear it ringing in his ears.

Zhang Bao saw him looking at him, his heart almost skipped its rhythm. He liked him so much to the point he found being around him intimidating, especially that he didn't smile much which made it harder to know if he was happy or sad. Bao leaned closer, leaving a few inches gap between them. He cupped Xing's chin bringing his face closer to him. He watched Xing's lips closely. The slow pace made Xing annoyed, he felt as though Bao was teasing him. He closed his eyes and leaned forward locking his lips with Bao's. Zhang Bao was startled by the movement, his face turning completely red, he felt his heart about to burst out of his chest.

After a few seconds Xing pulled back to catch his breath. He saw an unfamiliar look on Zhang Bao's face; normally he wouldn't get embarrassed so easily. Just as a smile appeared on his face, Bao came back again for another kiss. Xing didn't close his eyes this time. He felt the warmth of Bao's mouth against his. From half lidded eyes he studied the detail of Zhang Bao's face closely. He had never gotten to see him this close before. He couldn't help but think of how beautiful he was to him. He found it rather strange for thinking like that about a man. Bao opened his eyes for a moment, and pulled back straight away when he noticed Xing staring at him. He stood up quickly, scratching the back of his head the same way he did whenever he got nervous about something. Xing raised an eyebrow, surprised by the sudden action. "What?" He asked getting up onto his feet.

"Was I doing it wrong" Bao asked shyly, avoiding eye contact. It was clear that he was insecure about himself when it came to situations like this. Especially that he had confessed that he had never kissed anyone before. Xing walked over to the taller man and pulled him into a tight hug, Bao was still a bit confused but the hug felt reassuring. He wrapped his arms around Guan Xing's waist slowly. Walking back leisurely, he pinned him to the wall. Bao pulled back from the hug his arms still around Xing's waist. Guan Xing draped his arms around Bao's neck gently and Zhang Bao's irises glistened; he gave a soulful gaze, love displayed in his eyes. Though it wasn't as obvious on Guan Xing's expression, he was enjoying the contact just as much. He enjoyed the feeling of being allowed to surrender to him. Time and sound had stopped and that moment felt longer than it should have.

Whenever Xing felt upset about something, being with Zhang Bao made him forget. Feeling so defenceless with his back against the wall, Xing surrender to his lover without a hassle. Bao took the chance to steal another kiss from Xing's soft lips and both allowed themselves to remain like that for as long as they could. Xing felt content with the feeling of his lover's breath come and go with his own.

Getting lost in the moment, Zhang Bao decided to take it further, slipping his hands into Guan Xing's shirt, he caressed the warm skin of his back gently. He felt Xing's muscles tense whenever he touched him; it was easy to see how nervous he was. Xing moved his hands to do the same. His hands were shaking and he could not bring himself to lift the other's shirt. Just as he grabbed the cloth…

"How many times do I have to tell you both, you want to do that stuff, do it somewhere else, the next time I see you here I'm going to tell the principle" the two were interrupted by the school caretaker Jia Xu. He babbled on, clearly annoyed. He was probably more annoyed that he had to wake up so early to clean the school than finding them. Everyone knew the school janitor, he usually took out his anger on the pupils like it was their fault he hated his job.

Xing and Bao picked up their bags and walked off quickly, both feeling embarrassed for being caught in such an awkward situation. The two walked back to the front gate both faces as red as a tomato, it was good that he was the one who caught them and not someone else. They had gotten so carried away that they forgot about school, and it was nearly time for class.

"Do you want to come to mine today?" Bao asked shyly. He was hinting for more than just a sleep over. Usually Xing didn't understand him when he spoke like that but this time he was fully aware of what his lover wanted.

"I don't know... I don't feel like I'm ready..." He frowned, feeling a little scared at how fast things were going. He just felt like it was a short notice. He wasn't prepared to take the relationship that far but Bao had been waiting for him for so long. He knew he would never get what he desired lest he mentioned it. "I was going to ask you to stay at yours anyway, since you know... father kicked me out" He added.

"Okay, can we just... If you don't like it, then we'll stop" Bao looked at him with a hopeful look in his eyes, he felt guilty to have to ask him for such things but it wasn't like it was something odd to ask for when they had clearly confessed that they loved one another. Maybe his expectations were different to Xing's

"Alright..."Xing sighed. He couldn't help but to feel like he was being pressurized but he agreed to it. Zhang Bao smiled sweetly. He was nervous but excited at the same time. He really loved Xing and being with him made him happy. The two parted at the corridor each one going to his own class whilst thinking about the evening ahead of them.

* * *

The afternoon had come by so quickly. Of course Bao spent most his school day worrying about how things would go. Though it wasn't that obvious, he actually had little confidence in himself. Xing had spent the whole day worrying too, but for different reasons. He had just never imagined doing such a thing with Zhang Bao, which was really weird since he was the first to say he loved him more than just a friend.

They walked home together, both of them remaining silent for the entire length of the way; both were too occupied with their thoughts to notice the silence. They entered the house, and the two young men headed into Zhang Bao's bedroom straight away. Maybe they were taking this too seriously. Or maybe Xing just wanted to get it over with.

Guan Xing sat down on the bed waiting for the other to approach him. Zhang Bao paced over to him, lifting his chin higher; he placed a kiss on his soft lips. After that Xing moved further onto the bed to allow Bao some space. Lying on his back, he awaited his lover to come closer. The son of Zhang Fei leaned in, softly placing kisses on Guan Xing's neck. Anguo tilted his chin upwards to allow Bao more access to the sensitive skin.

The dark haired boy slipped a hand under Xing's shirt, caressing his skin gently. He tried to take things as slow as possible, taking into account that Anguo said he wasn't ready. The son of Guan Yu threaded his fingers into Zhang Bao's hair, tugging at it when the slightly older boy did something that was too sudden.

Zhang Bao looked down at him, his eyes dimmed by the darkness of the room; he leaned in, pushing Xing's head up so that he was looking directly at him, their noses almost touching. Anguo could feel his lover's hot breath against his lips; he stared into his eyes, the same thoughts as before returning to him. He couldn't help but feel awkward. He was quickly interrupted, yielding to the soft strength of yet another gentle kiss, he closed his eyes to try and return the love but he felt like he was failing greatly. Pulling back, Bao lifted his top over his head and threw it on the floor. He brought Xing's cold hands up, placing them onto his chest. Anguo was surprised at how warm the other was, he sat up gazing into his lover's eyes. He wasn't sure if he should tell him to stop or allow him to keep going.

Zhang Bao slipped his hands into Xing's shirt again, this time he lifted it up slowly, exposing the other's chest. It was heaving up and down with every intake of breath. His face flushed red; he could feel his cheeks heating up. He felt his heart hammer through his chest. By the way Bao was moving it made him feel like he could see right through him. He hated that. He was too used to keeping his emotions hidden; it was scary for someone to finally be able to see through all those walls he had built around himself. Zhang Bao took his hands bringing them closer to himself once again. He didn't know if the other had realised how much he was trembling under each touch. He brought his hands to his pants fastening and that was it. Xing couldn't take it anymore. He wasn't going to allow him to get any closer than that. He wanted to remain feeling like he was in control of his own emotions; he wanted to keep his strong upfront, going further would build a stronger attatchment and he didn't want that, he didn't want to think about him all the time the way he did, he didn't want to look at him one day and say he couldn't live without him. Guan Xing pushed him back suddenly, getting up; he quickly put on his shirt and stormed out the room to get away from all the heat. He was too afraid to admit that he needed him...

Zhang Bao was frozen in his place, he sensed his heart sinking. His chest heaved faster with every breath. Not only did he leave him confused but it was the feeling of rejection. He told himself he wasn't going to try anymore. Enough was enough was all that echoed in his head was. Xing was almost more concerned about how he felt and forgot to worry about those around him.

Bao sat on the edge of the bed, quickly putting his shirt back on, he tried to pull himself together. He hadn't felt this awful about something in a while. He would have preferred if Xing took his feelings into consideration for once or tried to be gentler about it. Trying to remain calm and composed he walked out of his room to search for Anguo. Looking around the house he sighed lightly when he found him in the kitchen drinking water. Xing frowned when he saw him, he knew he had to apologize. But he was always like that.

Just before he could speak, Bao quickly interrupted. "Should we play some video games"He asked, his usual cheerful smile was absent from his face. Guan Xing nodded, his pride not allowing him to apologize, he hated it when Bao did that. Zhang Bao walked on ahead to the living room and Xing followed him feeling guilty, he knew he had upset him; it was too obvious on the other's face even though he tried to hide it.

"Hey we want the TV, so move" Bao demanded. It was his way to tell his sister to get lost and give them space.

"Tough, I was here first" Xing Cai replied, acting all high and mighty as though she owned the house.

"I'm gonna tell dad" Bao added sounding like a five year old. Xing stood and watched, his gaze fixed on Bao. He promised himself he would say sorry as soon as they were alone again.

"Geesh Bao, you're such a big baby" She snapped, annoyed at her older brother. "Fine, I want to play too" She added.

"Noooo, you're gonna make us lose" He moaned, finding an excuse to shoo her off. In fact she was way better than him at playing; he just didn't enjoy looking like a loser in front of his best friend.

"Just let her play" Guan Xing added, taking a seat on the sofa.

Xing Cai smirked at her brother mockingly. It was her way of saying 'ha! In your face'. Zhang Bao rolled his eyes at her, setting up the console.

* * *

"Hey! I'm sorry okay" Guan Ping yelled, pleading to be forgiven and be allowed back into the house. Xiahou Dun happened to tell him about his nephew, Cao Pi, and Guan Ping told him what he thought off him, and now he was outside begging to be let in. Well let's just say Guan Ping isn't Cao Pi's biggest fan, and Dun had gotten very offended because of his love for his nephew. Xiahou Dun didn't have kids of his own, so to him, his cousin's children were like his own.

"I said I'm sorry" Guan Ping's voice became lower. Huffing, he threw himself onto the steps, resting his chin on his hand. "Looks like I'm destined to spend the rest of my life sitting on door steps" He mumbled. The door opened just a creek; Guan Ping turned, hoping he'd be allowed in now. Dun glared at him from behind the door, gradually opening it wider. Dun walked back in and Ping bounced up onto his feet quickly, entering the house before Xiahou Dun would change his mind.

"Clean the kitchen" Xiahou Dun ordered.

"What?! Come on" He moaned, very surprised to be given such orders.

Xiahou Dun pulled him by the arm heading for the door.

"Okay! Okay! I'll do it!" He yelled, pouting like a five year old. Those were the rules, obey or get kicked out.

"Make me tea" Xiahou Dun demanded.

Guan Ping glared daggers at the man, maybe he wasn't as kind as he was pretending to be after all. Of course staying over wouldn't be for free, he'd have to pay something in return. "I don't even clean my own house, he wants me to clean his" Guan Ping mumbled to himself, squeezing the water out of the mop.

"Quit complaining and work" Xiahou Dun commanded, pulling out a CD.

Guan Ping tried to peek from where he was standing. "Can I watch too?" He asked trying to pull an innocent face.

Xiahou Dun looked at him with half lidded eyes. The look he gave him was enough to answer the question, no words were needed.

"I'll clean everything like you want" He spoke dramatically.

Xiahou Dun sighed. "Alright hurry up" He lay back on the sofa, pulling his phone out to keep himself entertained by the time Ping was finished.

After an hour of cleaning and scrubbing, it was finally over. Ping rushed quickly throwing himself onto the sofa; Xiahou Dun felt like an earthquake just hit him. He stared at Guan Ping annoyed at how energetic he was, Dun wasn't used to such a loud atmosphere. He liked his house peaceful and quiet or maybe Ping was politer the first two days because he didn't know him, but it wasn't long till he made himself comfortable.

"Put it on, put it on" He cheered excitedly.

"Alright, alright, go get the popcorn from the top cupboard" Xiahou Dun sat up, turning the TV on.

Guan Ping returned already stuffing his face with the popcorn; he parked himself on the sofa once again.

"I never said you could have some" Xiahou Dun snatched the packet out of his hand.

"Hey" Guan Ping pouted. Just as Xiahou Dun was busy concentrating on the movie Guan Ping crawled closer to him. Xiahou Dun turned to the absurd teenager next to him, furrowing his brows. He stared at him wondering what the hell he was doing. Guan Ping gazed back into his eyes, and just when he was sure Dun had lost his guard, he stuck his hand into the packet grabbing as much popcorn as he could, and quickly withdrawing to his place.

Xiahou Dun shook his head at him, he found it so childish yet it still brought a smile to his face and Guan Ping laughed. "Here" Xiahou Dun offered him to take more rolling his visible eye. Guan Ping sat closer and the two managed to watch the rest of the movie without acting like little kids. Well most of it... Till they both fell Dun yawned, opening his uninjured eye, he looked around. Realizing he had fallen asleep at an awkward position, he stretched his neck, only satisfied when he heard a crack. Looking to his right, he noticed Guan Ping had fallen asleep on his shoulder. He pushed Guan Ping's face away as he got dark haired boy opened his eyes, shaking his head a few times. His eyes followed Xiahou Dun as he walked to the kitchen to make another cup of coffee.

"Well that was boring..." Guan Ping yawned again.

Xiahou Dun shrugged his shoulders, not really bothered. It was time for him to get on with some work now, and clearly by the look on his face he was not in the mood at all. Guan Ping crossed his legs, taking his phone out. Xiahou Dun brought his laptop from the other room and placed it on the table. Taking a sip from his coffee, he noticed Guan Ping smiling at his phone like an idiot.

"Your girlfriend?" Xiahou Dun teased curiously.

"No, I don't have one" Guan Ping replied miserably.

"Why not?" Xiahou Dun questioned, his full attention clearly turned to Guan Ping instead of worrying about his work.

"I'm talking to my brother Suo. Girl's don't like guys like me" Guan Ping explained pouting.

Xiahou Dun nodded in affirmation.

"What about you...? How come you're not married till now?" Guan Ping asked, seemingly very interested in Xiahou Dun's personal life.

Yuanrang shrugged his shoulders, pausing for a minute before he spoke. By the way he reacted Guan Ping knew it was wrong to ask him.

"I was married for a few months, it never worked out, so we got divorced" Xiahou Dun explained, his tone rather serious. Ping wanted to know more than that, he was eager to know why Dun was living alone; why he didn't have any kids, how come he never tried to find another woman, but he knew it was best to mind his own business.

Ping turned his eyes back to his phone; his fingers occupied with texting his brother. Xiahou Dun's gaze turned away from his laptop and focused on the youth seated at the other end of the sofa. He somehow felt like they got on so fast, it didn't feel like they only met a few days ago. Though he found him bothersome most of the time, it was nice to have someone to talk to. He had gotten used to the loud sound of silence, no one to share a snack with, no one to worry about you or ask you if you were alright.

Those things sounded simple, but it wasn't easy to find them. He knew he couldn't hope for much. Soon Guan Ping would have to go back home and it would all return to how it was before...

Dead silent...

* * *

"Guan Xing, does your father know you're here, son?" Zhang Fei asked interrupting the three teens' gaming session.

"Yes" He replied his tone slightly quiet. Bao glanced at him for telling a lie and Guan Xing simply out stared him.

Hours later and when it was time to sleep, both made their way to Zhang Bao's room, Xing knew this was his chance to apologize. Closing the door behind him Guan Xing turned to talk, but he paused, a little confused as to what the other was doing. Leaning under the bed Bao pulled out an extra mattress, blanket and pillow. Xing watched him as he adjusted them. 'Does he not want to sleep with me? He was fine just a minute ago' He told himself.

Zhang Bao slipped into the blanket, noticing the other looking at him; he gave him a faint smile. "Good night, turn the light off when you're done" He turned his face the other way to avoid any conversation taking place. Guan Xing turned the light off slowly and crawled up on Bao's bed. He felt terrible, it was obvious how hurt Zhang Bao was, but even when he was upset with him, he was still caring about him. He gave up his bed to sleep on the floor because he assumed the other would want space. After what happened earlier, he wasn't going to try and get any closer.

Drowning in guilt, Anguo stared at the boy lying on the floor. He couldn't help but to think that someone like that didn't deserve to be pushed away, he didn't deserve to be blocked out like the rest.

* * *

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 **Till next time ^-^ Ciao!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: You Win and You Lose

* * *

Failing to fulfil the promise he made, Guan Xing returned home the next morning. He told himself he would swallow his pride and apologize, but his ego defeated his good intentions. So he retreated like a coward, he drowned in guilt his self conscience wasn't going to leave him alone.

Yinping walked into the kitchen her eyes half lidded, she yawned still not fully awake yet, till she noticed Xing. Her eyes suddenly lit up, and she ran towards him pulling him into a motherly hug. "I was so worried about you!"

Xing didn't usually hug people, but when it was Yinping, he usually felt bad if he didn't, so he returned it with a gentle pat on her back. That was probably the best he could do...

Guan Yu walked into the kitchen wearing a pleased smile on his face. He leaned into the fridge grabbing the milk. "Has Guan Ping come home yet?" He asked.

"No..." Yinping replied pouting, as she turned on the kettle. "I've been trying to contact him, but he doesn't pick up" She continued.

"I asked Ma Chao about him yesterday but he said he didn't contact him" Guan Suo interrupted, a smile grew on his face when he noticed Xing's return, but he decided to not say anything about the subject.

* * *

"Okay, you go in to school now, I'm not moving from here till you go inside, so don't get any ideas" Xiahou Dun warned.

"Alright! Alright! Quit treating me like a baby" Guan Ping complained reaching to open the car door, but Dun grabbed him before he could leave.

"Give me your phone" He ordered as usual. That was the way he was, he never asks politely, it's always demands or orders. However Guan Ping complied without a word for once, he watched Dun tap away on his phone, curious as to what he might be doing.

"Here, I saved my number. If you need anything call me" He returned his phone to him.

Guan Ping smiled, he found it funny how Xiahou Dun did such sweet things without even realising.

"Come on, get out! I have work" Xiahou Dun demanded, feeling a little self conscious when he noticed Guan Ping's attempts at holding back the urge to giggle. He didn't know what he did to cause Guan Ping to laugh.

"Alright I'm going" Guan Ping announced, exiting the car and heading for the front gate. He watched Xiahou Dun's car drive away, still smiling at how kind he was. He could almost call him cute, but then again that's Xiahou Dun. Xiahou Dun and cute just simply don't go together.

Just as he turned around he found Ma Chao right in his face, he jumped in surprise, clearly too focused on Xiahou Dun and he hadn't noticed his presence.

"Why are you smiling like an idiot?" Ma Chao questioned giving Guan Ping weird looks.

"I'm not smiling" Guan Ping added quickly, trying to keep a straight face.

"Your brother asked me about you yesterday. Where were you?" Ma Chao asked.

But this time Guan Ping actually told the truth. "I ran away... Don't bother lecturing" He continued.

"I wasn't going to, I'm just asking" Ma Chao replied as though he was insulted by Guan Ping's remark.

"GUAN PIIIINGGGGGGG!" Yinping's loud yelling startled the two.

Guan Ping sighed turning to his hyper sister who was running towards him. "Yinping..." He grimaced.

"Where have you been?" She gave him a light punch to the chest. "Why don't you answer my calls?! I was so worried about you!"

"Sorry..." He replied, not knowing what else to say. Knowing he had no excuse and none would work on her anyway, she always managed to see through his lies either that or he was a bad liar.

She pouted angrily, clearly not happy with 'sorry' as a reply. Her cute face made Guan Ping find it hard to take her seriously when she was angry, he smiled at her and patted her head "Listen I'm alright. I've been staying over at a friend's house, there's absolutely nothing to worry about" He smiled genuinely.

"Who's this friend? When're you coming home? Father was asking about you" She calmed down, after his reassurance.

"I'm not going back" He replied his tone getting quieter. He removed his arm hand off her head and began to walk off to class. Ma Chao watched the two as Yinping quickly followed him.

"Why not, Ping?" She asked, with a hopeful look in her eyes.

"Do you wanna meet him" Guan Ping suggested, feeling a little unsure about Xiahou Dun's reaction to him inviting his family over without his permission.

"Won't he mind?"

"I've only known him for a few days" Guan Ping explained.

"And he let you stay over… He must be really nice..." She smiled.

* * *

The afternoon had come by and Guan Ping walked out the school gates with the company of Guan Yinping and Suo. He pulled out his phone to call Xiahou Dun, trying to walk a bit faster so that his siblings wouldn't hear the conversation.

"How do I say this... Can I bring my brother and sister over?" Guan Ping asked feeling a little hesitant, he was really pushing his luck.

"Absolutely not" Xiahou Dun's voice sounded flat, making it hard to figure out if he was angry

"Thanks" Guan Ping replied and quickly hanged up, he turned back to his brother and sister. "Where's Xing?"

"He said he had something else to do" Guan Suo replied. Guan Yinping glared at him, of course wanting him to defend Guan Xing's absence but he just shrugged his shoulders when she looked at him.

"Right..."Guan Ping grimaced. He knew to not expect Xing to care; the two had never gotten along to begin with. They didn't particularly hate each other but they didn't necessarily get along.

Reaching Dun's house, he knocked lightly, turning to his brother and sister with a smile. The two were preoccupied observing the outside exterior of the house. Guan Ping swallowed hard, hoping Xiahou Dun would try to act a little friendlier in front of them but that wasn't likely to happen. Yuanrang was quick to open the door saving Guan Ping any unnecessary comments from his siblings. The youth walked in quickly, smiling when he saw Dun. The other didn't really return the gesture.

"Hi there! I'm Yinping" The dark haired girl held her hand out to greet the man, but he quickly turned missing her hand. He walked into the living room as though it wasn't much of a big deal. Yinping turned to Guan Ping with a glare, her eyes were demanding for an explanation. First off all she never expected him to be that old, and second off all she he was extremely unwelcoming. Guan Suo turned around from closing the door; he slipped his shoes off and turned to his siblings.

"Did I miss something?" He asked, wondering why Yinping looked so offended. "So...do we go in?" He shrugged his shoulders, a little confused.

Guan Ping shook his head, leading the way to the living room, where Xiahou Dun was standing in the kitchen by his beloved kettle making coffee like the usual. Yinping and Suo observed him, hesitant to know if they were even allowed to make themselves welcome. They both found it surprising how normal Ping was being. He jumped on the sofa the same way he usually did, Guan Suo joined him sitting ever so close to him, probably even invading his personal space, but Ping didn't mind it much, he was kind of used to Guan Suo doing that. It was still a little odd however. Yinping joined the lot her eyes still fixed on the one eyed man. She sat down but not as close as her older brother.

She ushered with her head about him to Guan Ping, she was obviously as curious as ever now. Guan Ping grimaced, taking a deep breath. "That's Xiahou Dun... He let me stay over for a few days..."

Suo quickly interrupted him. "He seems very nice" He smirked sarcastically. Guan Ping turned to him, quite annoyed but his expression quickly changed when his eyes met with Weizhi's. His eyebrow twitched when he noticed the way the other was gazing at him but he chose to not say anything. Instead he smiled sweetly and turned around. Guan Suo always managed to do that to him, his handsome smile was irresistible, and Guan Ping knew that he admired him.

Xiahou Dun took his leave as soon as his cup was full of coffee, he exited the living room and Yinping quickly adjusted herself turning to face Ping.

"Where did you meet him and what does he want from you!?" She demanded for answers.

Guan Ping sighed pausing to narrow his eyes at her before speaking. "He's not very talkative but we get along" Guan Ping tried to defend him but Suo was quick to interrupt.

"Father wants you back home" He informed his tone turning more serious than earlier.

"I'm not going back" Ping insisted, he also turned very serious.

"You can't stay here, you don't even know him" Yinping's expression turned sad and a frown appeared on her face, Ping's conveyed the same emotion, he didn't like upsetting his sister but he was hurt after what he had heard the other day.

"I heard everything" He confessed his tone turning quieter. Both Suo and Yinping looked at each other in confusion, neither of them had a clue as to what he was referring to. Noticing the look on their faces, he raised an eyebrow. "What?" He asked.

"What are you talking about?" Guan Suo questioned.

"I went home and I heard what he said, it's obviously hard to love a child who's not your own." He added.

"Oh no! No no no no!" Yinping exclaimed. "Father was talking about Xing, he wasn't talking about you" She explained rather annoyed that such a silly misunderstanding had taken place.

Guan Ping just sat and watched her a little relieved that his father wasn't talking about him, it took him a few minutes to take in what happened, "I'm not going home, I'm staying right here" He decided, even after that. His father wasn't the most understanding of parents either and he had had more than enough for the past years, he no longer wanted to feel like a burden.

Yinping huffed, getting up quickly, she stormed out of the living room and was headed for the door, Guan Ping's stubbornness had driven her mad. Guan Suo rushed after her putting his shoes on and quickly following his angry sister.

Guan Ping watched them leave, he felt like a weight had come off his shoulders. But with all that happening he no longer had a reason to stay but he didn't want leave either, he told himself he'd try to get a job and find somewhere else to live, if Dun would allow him to stay till then anyway.

He somehow liked the quiet atmosphere, it was different to home, but it was peaceful. He walked over to Dun's room, stopping when he reached the door way, he folded his arms, and leaned against the wooden door frame. His eyes watched the other, but Dun didn't react and carried on to type away on his laptop. Guan Ping walked over to him, he crept into the blanket next to Dun, but he still didn't receive a reaction.

"You were adopted?" Xiahou Dun turned towards him and his face expression remained flat.

"You were listening?" Guan Ping asked with a dull tone.

Xiahou Dun turned away to his laptop to type again.

Guan Ping frowned, giving Dun a light push but with his head. "Why are you so kind to me?" He asked, his tone much quieter this time, he rested his head on Xiahou Dun's shoulder. Yuanrang almost flinched; but was quick to recover, he found himself enjoying the closeness, but felt it was better to avoid it.

After all, soon Guan Ping would leave and it would be lonely again. It was best to stay away to avoid getting hurt. Those four days felt like weeks. Xiahou Dun despised Guan Yu and was surprised that things had turned like this with him and Ping. Yuanrang pushed him away. "Get off me" He told him.

He probably wanted Guan Ping to leave as much as he wanted him to stay. He knew he was becoming attached too quickly, and he had no reason to.

He always wanted things he couldn't have.

Even as a kid, Dun didn't ask for much because he knew the answer would be no, growing up like that, he learnt to always expect to receive that answer. He eventually learned to go with it, but he eventually doubted his ability to resist and stand back up again.

No amount of coffee could cover up how tired he was of this world.

Every day was a constant cycle, it made life tasteless. Like living for the sake of living.

Life was unfair; it gives to some and forgets some.

Love from first sight didn't exist, especially between men anyway. Xiahou Dun was sure that whatever he felt was probably temporary. But it was wrong to bring Guan Ping into it. "Guan Ping... Go home" Xiahou Dun uttered. His tone of voice clearly disagreed with his demand. It wasn't easy to hide how much he wanted him to stay.

"You really want me to leave?" Guan ping asked, sounding very disappointed, as though he didn't expect it. But he knew he couldn't ask for more, Dun had already done more than enough for him.

Xiahou Dun looked a little hesitant at first but then he broke it down to him. "Go home" He ordered, his instructions were more firm this time.

Guan Ping didn't argue back like he normally would, instead he got up and began to pack his things into his bag, he left the room and then returned bringing his towel back from the bathroom, he placed into his bag and zipped it closed. Walking towards the door slowly, he stopped to put his shoes on. Xiahou Dun followed him to corridor slowly, he stood and watched him walk away, he wanted to keep him like he belonged to him, but people don't belong to people.

Xiahou Dun opened his mouth to say don't go, but the words refused to leave his mouth.

And so there he was he stood staring at the door, blinking only when he really had to, it wasn't long till loneliness accompanied him again, it had crept over him so coldly.

 _In life you only take what's yours._

* * *

The next day there was a loud knock on the door waking Xiahou Dun up from his slumber. He had been struggling with sleeping issues everyday but somehow he didn't even noticed himself fall asleep after Guan Ping had left. But who was knocking at the door? Xiahou Dun looked at his phone, surprised to see that it was six am; he paced to the door opening it to reveal the person behind the early disturbance. The one eyed man was surprised to see Guan Ping he see him again. He felt relieved but confused also.

Guan Ping raised an eyebrow "You're not going to let me in?" He asked, squeezing himself past Dun who continued to stand there surprised. Guan Ping walked in to the living room, Dun's eyes followed, as he blinked continuously still struggling to comprehend the situation.

"Why are you back?" He finally spoke confused of what the other wanted

"Can't I visit?" Guan Ping asked as if coming to Dun's house everyday was a normal thing now. "I just thought..." Guan Ping shrugged his shoulders seemingly struggling to get his words out. "Here open your hands" he told him trying to change the subject, he paced over to him, sticking his hand in his bag to look for something.  
Xiahou Dun sighed "Why don't you just go home, quit coming here" he told him sounding frustrated with the youth.

Guan Ping placed a small bag into Xiahou Dun's hand "I didn't think you'd mind" he said quietly.

Xiahou Dun didn't look so comfortable with the Ping's wording but he was intrigued by the bag he was given.

Noticing him eyeing it, Guan Ping added "Yinping makes the best cookies" He explained

Xiahou Dun remained frozen where he was. Though it was something so little he couldn't remember the last time someone had done something like that for him. Xiahou Dun wasn't trying to give it a label, he just chose to enjoy the goodies.

"Wait" He called attempting to stop Ping before he left. Guan Ping was quick to turn around as though he was wishing for him to say something in particular.

"I've got to go to school" Ping reminded.

Xiahou Dun paused for a moment to think. How could he have forgotten? "You're gonna stop visiting?" He asked.

Guan Ping shook his head and smiled.

It went well even after Dun's indecisiveness and constant mixed signals. Xiahou Dun's face turned straight, it just made him wonder, what it was about Ping and why was he important.

Things had escalated quickly.

* * *

Later that day Guan Xing approached Zhang Bao. "Come on! We're going to your house" He ordered.

Zhao Yun looked at Bao a little confused, as to what that was about. After all it didn't sound like he was asking him to visit his house; it was more like an order. Zhang Bao smiled at Zhao Yun ushering that he'll see him later. He turned to Xing his eyebrows raised as to what the other wanted, but he began to walk leaving for no chance for a conversation to take place.

Zhang Bao followed the other quietly, unlike Xing who was very determined to accomplish what was on his mind, Bao found the silence rather awkward and Xing's behaviour as strange as ever. It was probably even more awkward after yesterday's events. Bao spent most of the day avoiding him, and didn't want to be around him after all that took place, he needed some time. But as usual... Xing had no consideration for his feelings. In fact it made him wonder. He began to question why he fell in love with him. He almost didn't have a good enough reason to love him Xing was hard to love.

But whatever the case he just abided as he always did...

* * *

Guan Ping walked in surprised to find the door open. He entered the living room smiling when he saw Xiahou Dun. Guan Ping remained standing in the same place, watching the other. Just as Xiahou Dun came to sit down, Guan Ping grabbed the TV remote turning it off. Xiahou Dun turned to him.

Guan Ping placed the remote down on the table slowly, sitting down on the couch he turned to Dun. "I don't know much about you…" Guan Ping pointed out.

Xiahou Dun nodded not liking the serious mood. It felt strange.

"Where do you work?" Guan Ping asked, the smile returning to his face again.

"I'm teach at university" He declared. "Guan Ping, how old are you by the way?" Xiahou Dun asked resting his head on a pillow next to him as he gazed at the youth in front of him.

Guan Ping returned a smirk, gazing back into Dun's visible eye; he studied the detail of Yuanrang's face, his defined cheeks, his hair, and the lines on his face, his lips. Guan Ping blinked a few times when he came to realisation with what he was thinking. "Nineteen, I'm nineteen" He announced, looking around the room to avoid eye contact.

"Nineteen? Shouldn't you be in university" Dun asked surprised.

"I started school late you see" He explained resting his head on the pillow next to him also, so that they were facing each other but Ping's gaze was more like little glimpses as he struggled to hold eye contact.

"So you must be ahead of everyone in your class?" Xiahou Dun asked, his question sounding more like a statement.

"Nope, not the case at all..." He laughed as if he was proudly declaring his idiocy.

"Your brother Suo...He's very fond of you" Dun pointed out, trying to slightly change the topic.

Guan Ping raised his eyebrows surprised that it was so easy to notice. He shrugged his shoulders, as he didn't really have a reply to that.

"The cookies were good" Xiahou Dun added and a dimple appeared on his right cheek.

"Why didn't you want Suo and Yinping over" Guan Ping mentioned.

"I'd rather not associate myself with children of Guan Yu" Dun told him turning his face the other way, and returning to his normal blunt self.

Guan Ping couldn't help but to feel offended by the remark. "I'm one of them" He rejoined.

"You said you were adopted" Xiahou Dun said flatly, remaining to face the other way.

"How do you know Guan Yu anyway?" Guan Ping asked seemingly intrigued, he moved a few inches closer awaiting an answer but he wasn't given one. Even though it usually annoyed him when Dun spoke like that, it made it hard to tell whether he was happy or angry, this time it only irked him a little bit.

"That's not important" Dun implied, his voice sounding muffled against the pillow. Just before Guan Ping was about to ask why, Dun sprung up suddenly, nearly hitting his head with Ping's, he was startled to find him so close. He eyed the young man as he stood up taking a big stretch. "Come help me make dinner" He invited.

Guan Ping nodded still contemplating on why the older man avoided his question.

* * *

A while later the two had been occupied with cooking and Dun kneaded dough while Ping was cutting onions. "Why doesn't matter?" Guan Ping persisted not able to hide his curiosity.

Xiahou Dun sighed, taking a pause before he spoke. "He had an affair with my sister" He spoke out bluntly.

Shocked by the news Guan Ping looked at his fingers covered in blood, he blinked repeatedly trying to take the information in surprised that he didn't even feel the pain of cutting his finger.

"I told you to watch your fingers" Dun scolded. Taking Ping by the hand over to the tap. He opened the cold water and placed his hand under the running water. "I'll get you a plaster" He announced.

Guan Ping furrowed his brows still thinking about it. He hated to know such a thing about his father; he didn't want to lose the respect he held for him.

Yuanrang returned shortly. "Here" He pulled out a plaster, Dun held his finger placing the plaster on it.

"I'm not a baby" Guan Ping growled pulling his hand back, when he finally returned to his senses. Receiving no reaction, he took a deep breath, trying to clam himself. He had become furious after what he heard. He didn't want to believe it.

Dun returned to his dough making as before, which annoyed Ping even more, he hated how cold Dun acted at times, how he conveyed no emotions, he found it so cold.

But even though Ping knew he had no right to know he wanted him to share his thoughts with him, he wanted to know what he liked and hated, what bothered him and what made me happy.

* * *

"It's hard!" Zhang Bao complained.

"Just take it all in" Guan Xing, insisted.

Xing Cai stood by the door frame, her eyes about to pop out their sockets at what she was witnessing. She stood there, her mind completely blank, out of ideas and out of this world; she didn't know what to think. It felt as though a cold breeze had just brushed over her still figure bringing her back to reality. She blinked a few times, her mouth wide open and a horrified expression was visible on her face.

Zhang Bao flinched away from Xing, when he noticed his sister's presence. His face flushed as red as a tomato at how awkward and embarrassing the situation was right now. Guan Xing remained the same, expressionless as always, as though nothing had happened.

He turned to her with half lidded eyes, as though he was wondering what the fuss was about. Bao quickly pulled out the ice lolly out his mouth and made Xing hold it, he quickly left the room, to hide his face and had probably wished that the skies had struck him where he stood before his sister could witness him committing such a _foul_ act.

"Hey don't you want to finish it?" Xing yelled. Receiving no reply, he shrugged his shoulders and began to suck away happily on the strawberry flavoured ice lolly. Xing Cai stared at him, her eyes moving with the vile ice lolly. He passed by her casually, still not seeing what the big deal was. He followed his partner, while Xing Cai's eyes darted around the kitchen still trying to comprehend what had just happened. She blinked shaking her head, reaching for the fridge, she opened it and remained standing there staring at it. She had completely forgotten why she went to the kitchen all together.

Guan Xing stood by the bin, finishing off the last bits of his sweet treat, he threw away the ice cream stick and turned to the embarrassed Zhang Bao seated on the bed. He paced over to him slowly cupping his chin to turn him to face him. Bao complied but his reaction was less cooperative than the usual. He moved his head up, parting Bao's lips lightly with his thumb; he reached down to seal his lips with his partner's. Bao closed his eyes, relaxing in the moment, he felt the nervousness from earlier fade away slightly, but a little anxiety still remained, he didn't want to end up being rejected again, so he chose to be more passive towards Xing.

Pausing to catch their breath, Xing pushed Bao more back onto the bed; he adjusted himself so that he was seated on his lap, and Xing wrapped his arms around his neck and leaned in for another gentle kiss. He enjoyed the tender feel of his partner's lips, Bao's hot breath against his mouth; he took a light nip on the other's lips.

He only pulled back when he needed to catch his breath again and resumed the love making. He really liked kissing Bao, strangely it felt new. Though his heart was pounding hard against his chest, he still managed to keep his calm and try to make the moment last as longer.

Zhang Bao however felt his heart overflow with different emotions, he couldn't help but to question it, it annoyed him how the other did what he wanted with him whenever he pleased. Xing placed his forehead against Bao's, their noses touching and only a few inches gap between their lips. He gazed into his lover's eyes, his light green orbs conveyed more emotion than they usually did, his normally empty glare looked more soulful. Bao's let out a heavy sigh, expressing his aggravation at his partner, why did he always become so weak around him? So quiet?

"What's the matter?" Anguo questioned, his tone very quiet, avoiding to disturb the peace between them.

Zhang Bao gave out another sigh; he paused for a moment before he spoke, clearly hesitant about letting his thoughts out. He turned to face the side, but still remained close enough for their heads to stay in contact, he grabbed his partener's hands, bringing them away from around his neck. He threaded his fingers with Xing's gently. Anguo watched him cluelessly wondering what it was he was dying to say.

"You..." Bao began.

Xing raised his eyebrows wondering whether he was meant to answer, he gave a light nod, choosing to not interrupt what the other had to say.

"One minute you're so nice to me then you become so cold" He continued the hesitation was beginning to fade.

As for Guan Xing, for once in his life he decided to keep quiet and listen to what someone else.

"I don't get it, you say you love me, then you push me away again." Bao turned to face Xing. "You scare me; I don't know what to do to make you happy"

Xing removed his hands away, and got up, seating himself next to him. He clenched his fist angrily, sighing he started at the wall. "You're an idiot..." he declared. "You should have told me if something was bothering you" He snarled, his words clearly contradicted his anger, but that was just the way Xing was. He folded his arms, annoyed to being forced to confess. "This is all new to me and it's embarrassing" He blushed a little, his tone getting quieter as he turned to Xing, weirdly enough surprised by what the other said. It wasn't that he hadn't heard all of that before, but sometimes he just needed to be reminded of all those things.

Xing swallowed a lump in his throat, he remained facing the wall, only catching a glimpse of Bao's face when he was sure he wasn't looking. After a few seconds of silence, he decided it was his queue to retreat, he was now being pushed out of his comfort zone, he stood up wanting to leave, but Bao stood in his way holding his pinkie finger out for the other to make the promise. Xing eyed the hand placed in front of him; he found it rather stupid to pinkie swear now that they weren't little kids anymore.

He let off an angry sigh slapping Bao's hand away but he ended up hugging him instead of pushing him out the way, a more of a violent hug however, he tugged him by his collar to bring him closer to him, and wrapped his arms around him, burying his head into his chest. Bao blinked a few times to comprehend what just happened. He grinned happily wrapping his arms around the shorter boy.

* * *

Guan Yu walked through the door, looking rather tired after a long days work. He smiled effortlessly when his gaze fell upon his children. Yinping's eyes lit up upon seeing her father, she quickly rushed to the cupboard to take out the plates. "Father, food is almost ready, get changed while I set up the table" She smiled.

Guan Yu nodded too tired to engage in conversation. He was on his way to the bathroom to wash his hands, but was immediately interrupted by Guan Ping. "Father..." He called.

Guan Yu halted, trying to hold in the urge to let out a heavy sigh. "Not now Guan Ping, after dinner" He told him, quickly making his way into the bathroom, but Guan Ping followed him refusing to obey.

"Father..." Guan Ping tugged at his father's clothes like a little child.

Sighing loudly, Guan Yu dried his hands, and exited the bathroom. "Go help Guan Suo unload the crates off the van" He placed his hand on his shoulder, as though he was saying 'right now'. He escaped to his room where no one could bother him, locking the door behind him quickly.

Guan Ping sighed, walking back to the living room; he dived on the sofa snatching the remote control out of Xing's hand. "What are you watching?" He asked.

Guan Xing snatched the remote back, glaring at his brother. "Get lost" Guan Xing tried to remain calm, knowing Guan Ping was trying to annoy him on purpose.

"Father told you to go help Suo unload the van" Guan Ping lied.

"No he didn't he told you, now get lost!" Guan Xing snapped.

Guan Ping chuckled, finding it funny that he got caught. "He's your brother, go help him" Guan Ping added.

Guan Xing turned off the TV, sighing at how annoying Ping was.

"Hey go help Suo!" Guan Ping giggled, he seemed to have nothing better to do right now than bother his younger brother.

"Go back to the dump father got you from" Guan Xing cursed.

Guan Ping sprung up from the sofa, and Xing quickly began to run for his life. Guan Ping chased after him, but the latter had quickly retreated to his bedroom and locked the door before Ping could get him. "Open the door you little shit!" Guan Ping demanded.

"Go cry to your old man" Xing teased.

Guan Ping was easily provoked and his younger brother's rudeness had really made him furious. "Open the door you" Guan Ping banged on the door angrily.

"Be careful father doesn't hear you using that kind of language" Guan Suo interrupted. He didn't look very pleased with how immature his brothers were being.

"He started it" Guan Ping walked away mumbling to himself.

"No I didn't, he did!" Guan Xing yelled from behind the door.

"Shut your trap, or I'll come knock the door down on your head" Guan Ping threatened.

Guan Suo shook his head and took a stroll into the living room, taking a seat on the sofa, he turned the TV on and Guan Ping followed him, lying down he placed his head onto Suo's lap. Weizhi found himself smiling at the big idiot. "Why can't you two just leave each other alone?"

"I didn't do anything to him" Guan Ping insisted.

"Just leave him" Guan Suo, sighed. He placed the remote down on the table, and slipped his hands into Guan Ping's hair.

Guan Xing peeked his head out from behind the wall, checking if it was safe to come out now. Upon seeing him Guan Ping shot up from his place, but he was quickly held back by Suo before he could avenge his tarnished pride.

"Ping just leave him" Suo insisted.

Guan Ping adjusted himself on the sofa, trying to remain as calm as he could.

"Dinner's ready!" Guan Yinping called out from the kitchen.

Both Suo and Ping made their way to the kitchen, and Xing followed, trying to stay clear from Guan Ping. Soon their father had also arrived, and everyone began to dig into the delicious food, both Ping and Xing giving each other dirties in the process. Mostly the eating session was quiet as the family enjoyed the cheese covered spaghetti. Yinping wasn't so good at cooking Chinese food, and with school she didn't have the time to make such time consuming dishes, but her cooking was still tasty. Whenever Guan Yu was off, he usually helped; dinner times were more exciting when it was his work as they were all fond of Chinese dishes. It was probably Guan Yu's best attempt at trying to fill in for the absence of a mother; though it wasn't very successful, he still tried his best.

"Would you like some more?" Guan Yinping addressed her father.

"I'm fine sweetie, I'll put some myself" He got up from his seat, reaching for the spatula.

Guan Xing stretched his foot out as far as he could kicking Ping under the table. Guan Ping sighed, trying his best to ignore him, but Xing kicked him again. Ping glared daggers at him, but that didn't make him stop. Growing frustrated with his younger brother, Guan Ping kicked so hard that Xing's chair fell back and he hit the ground hard. Both Yinping and Suo burst into giggles as both knew their brother probably deserved it.

Guan Yu stared at Guan Ping frustrated with him, but Guan Ping avoided his gaze, pretending to be occupied with his food. It was blatantly obvious that it was him no matter how innocent he tried to act, it wasn't like a magical force would have appeared out of nowhere and flung his brother down on to the floor.

Guan Xing got up, pulling his chair up irritated. He sat down continuing to finish up the last bits off his food.

Guan Ping bit his lips trying to hold back his amusement, but Guan Xing wasn't going to let him get away with it that easily. When Guan Ping reached to place more scoops into his bowl, his cheeky younger brother pushed his chair back gradually, and when Guan Ping came to sit down he fell and so did his food.

Guan Yu slammed his cup, annoyed at the strange suspicious incidents of people falling over for no reason. Guan Ping got up from the floor taking the jug of water and splashing Xing with it.

"Guan Ping!" Guan Yu yelled.

"He started it!" Guan Ping yelled back and stomped off heading for his room.

"Come back here right now!" Guan Yu shouted angrily, but the youth chose to ignore him.

Shortly after dinner was cleared, Guan Yu came knocking on Ping's door. "Open the door" He ordered.

Guan Ping huffed reaching for his bedroom door; he unlocked it and headed back to his bed.

"What's your problem?" Guan Yu asked, his tone of voice expressed how frustrated he was at what happened at dinner, but he chose to let it pass for now.

"Nothing" Guan Ping twiddled his fingers, he wasn't used to being open with Guan Yu and as he grew older a wider gap grew between them, a wall of silence had built itself as the days pass, or more like reality of life, or the realisation that everything wasn't the same.

As much as Guan Ping had lots to say he was afraid of being misunderstood. Guan Yu was a great man, but he couldn't possibly ask for him to love him and to treat him exactly like the rest of his children. And Guan Yu wasn't able to see it or denied it when he told him he was treating him unfairly. But maybe he had no right to make such a request, and it wasn't a matter of ungratefulness, Guan Yu wasn't giving him what he needed.

"Are you just going to sit here in silence?" Yu questioned. "When are you going to behave like an adult" Guan Yu continued.

Guan Ping rolled his eyes as it turned into the same thing as always.

"You're supposed to be my eldest son and yet every time you disappoint me, Suo helps me out with everything, Xing does what he can yet all you do is complain, and claim I don't treat you fairly" Guan Yu spoke bluntly.

"The thing is no matter what I do you fail to notice what I do, you'll always see your own children better" Guan Ping expressed quietly as though he had already given up on the conversation.

"See that is your problem Ping, you can't get that idea out of your head, whenever I speak to you about anything you have to mention that I'm not your father. That idea is in your head, I treat you all just as equal, I don't know what else you want" Guan Yu yelled "Grow up! You're nineteen not nine, start acting like it" Guan Yu demanded, getting up he exited the room, too fed up and tired to continue such pointless conversation and just as always the discussion had led to nowhere.

Guan Ping felt frustrated with his father's words; it wasn't that he didn't understand, he was refusing to listen. He tried to tell him how he felt, but he couldn't blame Guan Yu, what more could a child ask for than the love of a family or the feeling of belonging, but it had been a long time that all of that was forgotten, that that child needed more care and love than the rest, he had missed out on many things in his earlier years. Ping didn't envy Suo and Xing nor was he jealous that they were better than him in everything. None of that bothered him at all.

By night Ping's anger faded into sadness, a lonely kind of sadness. The four walls surrounding him were suffocating; he turned the light off to he let the darkness sink in. At that moment he felt like he had no one and the world had turned its back on him.

* * *

Returning from work, Xiahou Dun pulled over, parking his car, he collected the necessities, including his phone, his keys and bag before locking his car he stopped when he noticed the depressed looking teen sitting at his door step, he watched him till their gaze met and so he continued to stroll to the front door. He opened it placing his stuff inside; he left the door open for Guan Ping to walk in as he walked back to his car.

The youth got up slowly, carrying himself heavily, he walked in only relieved when he finally had the chance to sink into the comfy armchair in the living room. A few moments later Dun entered the room with big pieces of wood in his hands.

Guan Ping observed quietly as he watched the one eyed man casually minding his own business. The dark haired boy didn't usually like it when people asked him what was wrong, but he really wanted Dun to ask. Seeing Dun had moved the pieces of wood to his bedroom Guan Ping followed him standing at the door way.

"Looks like someone had a bad day" Dun pointed out, as he placed the wood in a formation that looks like a desk.

Guan Ping frowned but still didn't say a word.

"Come hold this a second" Xiahou Dun requested, as he pulled out a screwdriver.

Guan Ping complied. "Why is life unfair?" Guan Ping asked randomly letting off a sigh.

"Everyone has problems Ping, that's how life goes" Xiahou Dun wasn't the most optimistic person when it came to advice or cheering someone up.

Guan Ping looked at him helplessly, he could really do with a hug right now but Dun wasn't the affectionate type so he didn't really catch that hint.

It took a few hours till Dun was finally finished and content with his new desk. Guan Ping had been sitting by the wall, the whole time just watching him silently. Though he was still as gloomy as he was when he first arrived, it felt a bit better. Though Dun's house was lonelier and less occupied he preferred it here.

"Come on" Xiahou Dun grabbed Guan Ping's hand and pulled him up to his feet. Leading him to the kitchen, but before Dun could reach for the fridge he was quickly stopped by the arms that wrapped around him. His heart slightly sank by the gesture, turning to Ping; he pulled him closer to his chest. Guan Ping found it warm and comforting and he stayed like that for a while.

Later in the evening, Yuanrang walked into his room with his coffee looking rather pleased that he had some working space now. Guan Ping took a glance at the one eyed man, then his gaze returned to his phone as he comfortably laid in Xiahou Dun's bed. Looking back at Ping, Dun got off his chair and closed the bedroom door.

He drew the curtains closed and lay beside Ping, a strange change of plans, he left his coffee and snuggled into the bed deciding he would sleep instead. He adjusted the blanket to cover himself, while Guan Ping watched him discreetly. He wasn't sure how to feel about them being so close, like it made sense for Dun to want to sleep in his own bed, but it just seemed awkwardly weird that he didn't mind sleeping with him next to him.

Reaching into the side table, Xiahou Dun pulled out a bag from the top draw. Digging into the bag filled with medicines, his struggle had ended when he found the tablets he was searching for. The one eyed man reached to a bottle of water, tugging the liquid down as though his life depended on it. He looked content emptying half the bottle.

"What's that for?" Guan Ping asked, watching Dun put his stash of tablets away.

"Sleeping pills." Dun replied calmly. "Turn the light off" He told him, sinking into the blanket where he made himself cosy and comfortable. Guan Ping thought to himself how strange it was that it didn't feel awkward when both of them was silent. He leaned over him, his arm brushing on Dun's as he tried to reach for the light. Turning it off he also sunk in, not allowing his thoughts to lead him anywhere but he still found himself contemplating on whether it was okay for two men to sleep in the same bed, he eventually fell asleep and none of it mattered.

* * *

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